Tag Archives: TuftsLife

45. Hating on SIS

I can’t uncurl my fists, so I’m just typing with my nose. NBD.

Late fall and spring are beautiful times of the year. The seasons fold into one another and students notice a change in temperature, wardrobe, and most importantly, SIS traffic.

Regardless of what your orientation leader tells you about TuftsLife.com, SIS is the website from which all Tufts students plan their frenetic lives. SIS is where we track our transcripts, deliberate over whether or not we’ll make the Dean’s list, and grumble over our plummeting GPAs. Most importantly, SIS is where we all register for classes during the late fall and spring.

Although you will be notified of registration period via email, it’s easy to pick up on the change in campus atmosphere this time of year. Jumbos are glued to their laptops during class, monitoring the rise and fall of class sizes. In between periods, Jumbos carry those thick course booklets with a heightened sense of awareness, circling blocks of seminars in red marker as if to say, “I’M PREPARED. HOW ABOUT YOU.”

Even though no one actually cares, everyone will start conversations with “What are you taking next semester?” This conversation starter is a BAD IDEA. Mainly because it invites the other person to list every single problem they have with their scheduling. Here are a few examples:

“Oh my god, I have such a shitty registration time. Which is totally unfair because I had one last year, too”

“Math of Social Choice already has a waitlist! I’m so not gonna graduate.”

and most importantly…

“EXPLETIVE EXPLETIVE EXPLETIVE FUCKING EXPLETIVE SIS just FUCKING SHUT DOWN ON ME.”

Hating on SIS is just part of the registration process. The sooner you come to terms with the fact that a) SIS is a temperamental shrew and will only operate on select few Internet browsers b) SIS likes to take its sweet time logging you in while spots in highly coveted classes fill up  and c) SIS sucks, you will be a happier Jumbo. In the meantime, go ahead and accept being on the waitlist for 4 classes; it’ll all work out in the end.

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37. Off-Campus Housing

This ol' house...

After two years of meal plans, RAs, and “quiet hours,” many Tufts people like to venture to the blissful dreamland known to its inhabitants as Off-Campus Housing. This magical place has been heard of in tales passed down from generation to generation. Legends of “The Greatest Party Ever,” and “The Most Awesome Sex I Had While My Roommate Was Still Present” have taken place in this beautiful land.

Although many Jumbos have only dreamed of Off-Campus Housing, it doesn’t mean reaching it is impossible. But be forewarned! The journey to Off-Campus Housing is fraught with peril. Only those brave enough to endure the hardships have attempted it and even fewer have succeeded. If you believe you’re courageous enough, be prepared to meet the following trials en route to glorious Off-Campus Housing:

1. Squirrelly half friends who you only half like but need in order to fill up your house
2. Oil heating
3. Crazy Landlady from Hell
4. Crazy Landfamily Who Lives In The Basement
5. Squirrelly half friends who you only half like because they assume they are living with you when they are not.
6. Lease deadlines
7. Safety deposits
8. Coercing everyone and their mother to sublet from you during winter break
9. Rodents
10. Listening to other Tufts people celebrate when they’ve finally signed their own lease

Once you have endured all these hardships, rejoice! You are one of the few and proud citizens of Off-Campus Party City. Meal plans? Ha! Cooking for yourself is so much resourceful anyway. Turn up that Ke$ha song at 3AM; your housemates certainly won’t care, right? And screw hall snacks; real housemates bond over post-party cleanup sessions.

Might we even suggest… hall sports?