Tag Archives: Carmichael

47. Competitive Complaining

My life is way harder. This I promise you.

Every Jumbo’s got that one friend who never wants to go out on the weekends because they have a test on Monday. You generally like this friend, but griping is just not a great way to pregame pregaming and you don’t usually see them much outside of class or Tisch.

To catch a glimpse of the Perpetually Stressed Friend, just look around campus the second week of December or the first week of May. Or better yet, look in the mirror. Around finals week, we all become this friend. Yes, the one that flakes out on friends to reread Bio 13 notes. Yes, the rando classmate that asks you for all the notes you took on Comparative Politics last year.

You may be thinking to yourself, “No! It can’t be! I’m not that douche bag!” False. We all get stressed at least twice throughout the school year. Here is one way to realize you’ve made the transition from Normal You to Finals You: competitive complaining. People like to hate on Tufts sports, but competitive complaining is an activity every Jumbo’s good at. Some people participate more than others, but its presence on campus grows exponentially during midterms and finals. It sounds a little something like this:

“This is weekend is going to be absolute hell. I have an econ problem set and two papers to write.”

–“Ugh, I know. I have three research papers and it’s gonna take hours to finish all the programming I have to do.”

“Whatever, at least your thesis isn’t due in like, three days.”

–“Oh yeah? Well four of my professors decided to schedule their finals five days in advance. Plus I have eight theses underway, I have to translate three Chinese novels into Swahili, and I’m performing in the Mongolian Culture Show for peace in the Middle East. Step off.”

This exchange is quite popular in the Tisch Conversation Area, Eaton, Dewick, and Carmichael, all places where stressed out Jumbos go to “relax” with other stressed Jumbos. Even though we may not want to admit it, competitive complaining is part of Tufts life. Let’s be real. Even if we had a stress free weekend with perfect weather and zero percent chance of finals, we’d still find something to complain about (i.e. “WTF The Roots? I don’t pay 53 grand a year  to watch Jimmy Fallon’s house band.“).

This post was suggested by Katie Boland (’11). Make your own suggestion by emailing stufftuftspeoplelike@gmail.com or tweeting at @tuftslikesthis

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44. The Tufts Daily Comics page

"What's a five letter word for phallus?"

Since NQR has been banned, there have been laments about the fact that Tufts people don’t participate in  enough campus-wide activities. This is false. The Tufts Daily creates a campus-wide activity every day through their comics page.

If you say you’ve gone through your entire Tufts career without attempting to blaze through Sudoku in the middle of a lecture, you are a liar. And if in fact you are telling the truth, you cannot deny that you have, at one point, spent half an hour struggling with a seven-letter word for “Sturgeon yielding expensive caviar” during a solo lunch in Carmichael.

By making us look like we’re busy and don’t need friends, the Daily’s Word Jumble is also a wonderful resource for avoiding communication with classmates.  It’s just mind tickling enough to distract from the awkward silence of an empty classroom, but not so challenging that you end up in tears.

And if you really feel the need to break the ice, you can always chortle at “Married to the Sea.” Hopefully this will invite someone to ask you why the hell you’re snorting into the newspaper (this is a classic pickup line that has been used many a time at Tufts and it is the reason for many of the relationships you see around campus).

1. Dewick v. Carmichael debates

Carmichael Dining Hall

There’s nothing Jumbos love more than a good ol’ argument. Take the legendary Oral v. Cheese debate. Friendships, romances, and bromances have been casualties of this timeless dispute. The debate that really gets Jumbos really riled up is the neverending argument between Dewick MacPhie Dining Hall and Carmichael Dining Hall. Uphillers will begin citing their fondue and stir-fry nights while Downhillers rebut with their International night and the impressive variety of cuisine. In terms of aesthetics, Uphillers have to deal with low ceilings while Downhillers enjoy a more spacey environment. While both dining halls have their pros and cons, both share one major setback: no matter where you eat, you are guaranteed at least 1 awkward run-in with a former hook-up per semester.